teaching

Teaching on Tuesday was really challenging at first but then it gradually got better. I know we have all had some major realizations since the last time David was under the blindfold, but wow! he was good. When I found out he was disoriented at the top of the stairs in Dodd I was almost relieved. I wanted to have an opportunity to teach him, to see what it would be like when a student is 'lost' and how to successfully get them back on track. Again, it is really helpful having Micky around to intervene with helpful hints and suggestions. Sometimes I get irritated with myself because the answer seems so obvious, but other times when Micky explains something I think I would have never thought of it. I really do enjoy the part teaching part learning how to teach process.
When David went up the spiral stairs in Dodd I was surprised that he got turned around because visually it appeared so simple. I thought he would have been more likely for him to get lost on the bottom floor of Dodd when the hallway shifted. It reminded me of what I think Rovetta might look like, so I guess I thought David would have the same problem.
The elevator wasn't too bad, and it was really neat to see how the bottom floor lined up with the top. The anticipation of getting into the elevator is the worst, but once I was in I feel a bit better, like 'well I'm already in so I have no choice but to keep going' I liked Micky's point about 'it's time to be a teacher' and not to let if effect my student. While I know David understands my weird thing with elevators, it did remind me that one day I will have students that need to use elevators, and I have to step it up and deal with it for their benefit.

Back in Diffenbaugh

Today was the first time I really felt like I taught, and it was hard. I was unsure how much information to give David, I didn't want to overwhelm him, I also didn't want to give information away too easily without giving him the change to explore and figure it our on his own. I had problems like this in the beginning of my TVI classes and in my internship at F.S.D.B. It is very difficult to step back and just let the student explore. I feel like there is a fine line between too much help and not enough. Sometimes I feel stressed when trying to find the perfect balance, because it is different for every student. During my internship I was able to practice giving just the right amount of assistance to my students because I saw them almost everyday, and I was in "teacher mode". I feel like I need to get back to that, and because O&M is so new to me, I will need to adjust my teaching style and learn what works.
Honestly, today I bit my tongue so many times. At one point David was at the end of the hallway, running into a trash can, and he asked me if he was at the end. At first I wasn't sure if I should tell him or ask him where he thought he was. I decided to just tell him, because if he was asking me then it showed he had an idea of where he was...right?
Also, when trying to teach today I felt like I was describing things in really awkward ways. I felt like when I tried to tell David where we were, or where we were going, it would get all mixed up and so at the end I would say "does that makes sense?" or "is that right?" I just need to get my teacher mindset back.
I realized today how much you really have to physically "be there" as an O&M instructor. When we were leaving Williams, David was approaching some stairs. I thought that since he had just come up those stairs a minute or 2 before he must know they are there. Well, I am not sure exactly what happened, but from where I was standing it looked like he was about to take a casual walking step and roll down the stairs. Not thinking to grab him or stand in front of him I just yelled "stairs stairs stairs!". I was distracted by trying to think of what else I could have him do once we got back to Diffenbaugh. That was a little scary, I will be more careful next time.
Feeling a little flustered from a surprise elevator visit may have also effected my nerves when trying to work with David. It made me realize this is something I need to get over to be an effective, focused teacher.

What is Orientation...?

Going back into Rovetta on Thursday was probably the most, excuse the pun, “eye opening” class experience I have had so far. I started off really confident, and when I found the long hallway and turned at the right time I thought it was going to be so easy to find the bathrooms. I was heavily relying on what I knew, or really what I thought I knew, from my last 2 visits. When I reached the end of the hallway I was determined to find that glass part of the wall I had felt before. When I couldn't find my landmark, everything just kind of fell apart. I can't really put it into words what happened inside my head, it was just an all consuming feeling of being lost. I would try to regroup my thoughts, focus on sounds, the feeling of the wall, try to picture where the front doors where, but every time I tried something and it didn't work, I became more and more frustrated.

Once Mickey stepped in I began to feel even more anxious, I think partly because I was embarrassed to have to stop and tell every one "I have no idea where I am". I just could not pull it together. I have had frustration like this before, but after Mickey kept taking me back and I STILL did not know where I was, I felt like I was never going to get it. Once Katie showed me the corner, and how to square off to find the doorway to the bathroom my confidence was renewed. But then Mickey tried to make me go a different way.... and this did not work in my one way, one track route. I remembering feeling almost angry, saying "Why do I have to go this way if the other way is so much easier???" It wasn't until later that I realized what valuable insight this experience was going to give me into the feeling of my future students.

So then I found the water fountain, and this became my rock, I mentally tied myself to it so I could get around the room. It helped somewhat, but I was still having trouble. When Mickey told me to mentally attach myself to the bathroom, it all clicked. All I could think was WHY? Why was I doing this with the water fountain, but not the one place I was trying to get to? This class makes me feel like a total moron sometimes. But once Mickey began explaining orientation, and moving me around in open areas, and I could get right back to the bathroom, that was a break through for me. You can read research articles and books all day about the idea of Orientation, but no book could ever give me the understanding that I have now. So sometimes this class make me feel wonderful too...

(excuse any spelling and grammar errors, I'm in the airport, flight is leaving, no time to proof read)

stairs

I'm glad we had a rainy day today to spend some time on stairs. I really needed to work on them, since I have not been on stairs under blindfold in a while. Going up is so much easier, and less stressful than going down stairs. I think it has something to do with my fear of falling down stairs, because you can't really fall up stairs. I guess you could trip, but that's all, you wouldn't roll and keep rolling like you would if you fell while going down.

I think it also has to do with how much information I get from my cane. When going up I hit each step, I hear it, I feel it, and when I get a rhythm going it's so easy to tell when I have reached a landing. However, going down is very different, my cane is floating, I don't hear or feel anything until the very end. Sometimes I drop my cane too low and hit a step, then I think I'm at the bottom, take a weird step and scare myself when I realize there are more stairs. So the next time I go down the stairs when I really do hit the bottom I second guess myself, and take awkward cautious steps to be sure I really am at the bottom. I think this will be something I have to work on, and will build more confidence as I go.